Peace

Time for me to weigh in. This is my first official blog post ever on any blog. You are reading history. Now to the topic at hand...

Well, it wasn't peace at first. At first it was "no." When Courtney and I had some more serious discussions about adoption in January, I had just become comfortable with the idea that we were done having kids. From early in our relationship, we discussed having two or three. Recently the conversation focused more on stopping at two so that we could have enough time to focus on building relationships with our kids' friends, relatives, and neighbors.

I thought I had built a pretty good argument in my head for not having any more kids and for simply donating some money and maybe volunteering to help with orphans from time to time. I didn't want to pray about adoption because we had just decided not to have any more kids. We had a plan. Surely God would confirm that He wanted us to be available to build relationships with others rather than adding one more soccer game to our Saturdays for the next 18 years.

Reluctantly, I prayed.

I wasn't diligent in this prayer, but I did ask for God's direction and wisdom. During these times of prayer, there was a recurring thought. It wasn't a guilty push or clanging gong. God amazed me with His gentle nudging. The thought wouldn't leave me, and I couldn't come up with an answer. "What am I doing to sacrificially have the maximum impact in this life for Christ?"

Don't get me wrong. I tried to come up with an answer. But there was also part of me that didn't want to come up with an answer. I don't want what I've done so far to be it. Surely I'm capable of more. I want to be part of God's grand plan - part of something big that may impact hundreds of lives and be talked about for generations. So there I was. Stuck with a question I could not answer and beginning to ask myself a different question. "Why wouldn't we adopt?"

I couldn't answer that question either. There was no good reason for me not to consider adoption. Sure there are plenty of scary "what-if" scenarios, but we have the ability to provide a loving home to a child in need and impact a life forever. Then it hit me. There was an email in my inbox highlighting a need for adoptive families right here in Dallas. Right in my back yard. The decision was made. Here is a need that I can fulfill.

And then it happened. Peace.

My mind and soul filled with peace. And God continues to provide that same incomprehensible peace even as I type this now. No matter what potential thought or fear has come to mind, God has guarded my thoughts and given me focus on the role that He wants Courtney and I to play for this child. One of my favorite chapters in the Bible is Philippians 4. I'm experiencing the peace that is discussed in this chapter - especially verses 6-7: "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

May your decisions today bring you into God's peace - it is such a wonderful place to be.